♪ Adidas Sneakers by Jeremy Scott
♪ Be more Christ-like
♪ Be multi-lingual; master Chinese, Japanese, Korean, German and French
♪ Black Doc Martens' Boots
♪ Canon EOS 60D with 60mm Macro USM lens, 10-22mm USM wide-angle lens and EF-S 18-200mm lens
♪ Get married to the right man
♪ Hoodies
♪ Kittykats
♪ Louis Vuitton Damier Graphite Canvas Brazza Wallet
♪ Ombre hair
I really thought I was done crying. I though I'd just miss him occasionally but or some reason I cried when I woke up today. Maybe it's because I dreamt of him. Maybe it's because I missed him so much.
Night. Things are getting complicated, and once again I couldn't control myself and cried. I guess the only good thing that came out of it is that it made me sleepy. Who knew break-ups were so messy?
am feeling more and more mixed up as the days go by. On some days I miss you terribly, and on others I really don't care anymore. Am I moving on, or am I just numb to the pain?
I just want to be happy. I'm envious when I see happy singles, happy couples, and generally happy people. It's like, my only source of long-term happiness comes from him and I know it's not supposed to be like that, but spending time with my family and friends just gives me happiness for a while, and then I think about him and it's back to square one. Guess I have to be unhappy for another 2 more months before I finally have it all together again. What do I want right now? It's basically all about him. For him to call me endearing terms again, for him to even think about me, for him to prioritize me again, for him to hug & kiss me, for him to cuddle with me, for him to be happy with me. I know I sound a little selfish, but I always want to be the one to make him happy but for some reason it always backfires. And I'm not really looking forward to my birthday, because I know I won't be able to celebrate it with him as boyfriend/girlfriend, or with him as friends even.
Okay I sound like a fool in love, but that's what we all are... right?
.. Is there a pill to make you go to sleep for 2 months? I really need that. Or happy pills. I just need something.
Looked at your twitter and saw that the iPad 2 has arrived.. If we were all good you would have texted me straight away and I'd be the first to know, but now I'm not. It's quite sad and strange to see that I'm now no longer the first. Said this a lot, but I still wish everything was back to the way it was.
just wanted to say, I've been saving this so I could share it with you. I received it from my girlfriend Angelia after the break and I'm here, waiting for it to end so that I could eat it with you. Maybe I'm just a stupid girl who wants to share everything nice with the person she loves.
I decided to deactivate my facebook account and my twitter account. I could really use a break. I'm tired. Not going to resist anything you say or do anymore.
met today, unexpectedly. Things were so awkward, we pretended either didn't exist. No hellos, no goodbyes. I wanted so bad for you to come and talk to me, tell me the break is over, tell me everything is okay and the distance between us will no longer be there. You didn't. I didn't expect you to, anyway. I just really hoped you would, but once again expectation led to disappointment. If I could do anything, I honestly would. But you were the one to put the distance between us. I can't do anything but wait for you to come back.
on a break. I still don't fully understand what a break in a relationship means. Does it mean you break up temporarily? Does it mean you are still together but ignoring each other? I don't know how people can get back after a break and act as if nothing has happened. Okay maybe it's just me. I feel like I've been continuously rejected, and in the end I'm just tired. Tired from trying and tired of being rejected. If we get back like normal, would it mean that I am now at your beck & call? A disposable.. item? When you're happy, you stick with me. When you're mad, you call for a time out and just ignore me. What about my feelings? Am I not allowed to voice out what I feel? And even if I do, will they be heard or will they be ignored? When you feel like you're done being mad, you just appear. I hate it when I ask you when it would end, and you give me a simple 'I don't know', then decide by yourself when you want the break to end. Do you actually expect me to be as affectionate? I think not.
Today Rayen did something sweet. It's just a little thing to others, but it's a big thing to me.
We got cheese fries and he ate all the fries surrounding the cheese (those that didn't have cheese on it). When I asked him why, he said it was because he wanted to save the best for me.
Okay so most of my friends know that I'm attached, but I'm just gonna blog about him here.
He's 2 years younger, but he's as mature as anyone my age when it's time to be serious.
He cares a lot about me, and always makes sure I'm happy and my stomach is filled. He's also very caring towards his friends, and makes sure they're okay by talking and encouraging them.
He sends me home after school even though he's tired, and he waits up for me at night and makes sure I'm in bed before he sleeps although he's zombie-fied.
He always encourages me when I'm down, when I don't want to go to school, anytime when I need it.
There are a million other things that I'd say, but I just want to say I love you.
My primary love languages are probably Physical Touch and Quality Time.
Complete set of results
Physical Touch:
8
Quality Time:
8
Acts of Service:
6
Words of Affirmation:
5
Receiving Gifts:
3
Information
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.
In an effort to get people to look into each other’s eyes more, and also to appease the mutes, the government has decided to allot each person exactly one hundred and sixty-seven words, per day.
When the phone rings, I put it to my ear without saying hello. In the restaurant I point at chicken noodle soup. I am adjusting well to the new way.
Late at night, I call my long distance lover, proudly say I only used fifty-nine today. I saved the rest for you.
When she doesn’t respond, I know she’s used up all her words, so I slowly whisper I love you thirty-two and a third times. After that, we just sit on the line and listen to each other breathe.
Somehow it feels pretty weird when I'm not in love anymore. After 4 years and then gradually, unconsciously, I'm all alone in my thoughts again. I'm feeling rather lost; and I don't know if it's a good or bad thing. Perhaps I should just ignore these feelings and just get on with life, dammit. I'm sorry, I'm writing this at 2.55am and my thoughts aren't exactly coherent. Or sound, for that matter.
It might not be the right time I might not be the right one But there's something about us I want to say Cause there's something between us anyway
I might not be the right one It might not be the right time But there's something about us I've got to do Some kind of secret I will share with you
I need you more than anything in my life I want you more than anything in my life I'll miss you more than anyone in my life I love you more than anyone in my life
